He was a senator from Nevada. He was married and he was a member of a secret Christian Club in Washington D.C. that advocated for traditional family values. He was very outspoken about keeping the traditional family together. He had power, he had influence, yet he fell into temptation. He saw her and he needed her. He wanted her. His power wasn’t enough to satisfy him. His family wasn’t enough to satisfy him.
There was another politician, a senator from Mississippi, who served over 12 years in Congress. He was married, had a beautiful family, had power in Washington, yet he wasn’t satisfied. He found comfort and solace not in his job, or in his family, but in his mistress, who he kept for almost his entire career. Even though he was involved in the same secret, Christian, Washington club that advocated for keeping the traditional family together, he was being unfaithful to his wife. This senator recently said he would not seek reelection, because he wanted to focus on his family. And now, the truth is out and the senator’s estranged wife is suing the mistress, and making a national spectacle of the whole situation. His power wasn’t enough to satisfy him. His family wasn’t enough to satisfy him.
And then there was a governor who had an international affair. He had a beautiful family, and power. He was and still is a huge voice in the circle that promotes “traditional family values” above all else. He was a Godly man who served his state and his family and he tried to uphold biblical principles. He was also a member of the secret, Christian club in Washington. But he fell into the grip of lust and passion. His power wasn’t enough to satisfy him. His family wasn’t enough to satisfy him.
All three of these stories are ones that might be familiar to us. Infidelity does not happen only in political circles, nor is it a modern phenomenon. Men and women have for ages fallen to the temptation that is cheating. One of the most well known stories of infidelity comes to us in scripture. That brings me to today’s text, which is found in 2 Samuel 11.
Hear these words.
1 In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king's men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.
2 One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, 3 and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, "Isn't this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?" 4 Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) Then [a] she went back home. 5 The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, "I am pregnant."
6 So David sent this word to Joab: "Send me Uriah the Hittite." And Joab sent him to David. 7 When Uriah came to him, David asked him how Joab was, how the soldiers were and how the war was going. 8 Then David said to Uriah, "Go down to your house and wash your feet." So Uriah left the palace, and a gift from the king was sent after him. 9 But Uriah slept at the entrance to the palace with all his master's servants and did not go down to his house.
10 When David was told, "Uriah did not go home," he asked him, "Haven't you just come from a distance? Why didn't you go home?"
11 Uriah said to David, "The ark and Israel and Judah are staying in tents, and my master Joab and my lord's men are camped in the open fields. How could I go to my house to eat and drink and lie with my wife? As surely as you live, I will not do such a thing!"
12 Then David said to him, "Stay here one more day, and tomorrow I will send you back." So Uriah remained in Jerusalem that day and the next. 13 At David's invitation, he ate and drank with him, and David made him drunk. But in the evening Uriah went out to sleep on his mat among his master's servants; he did not go home.
14 In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it with Uriah. 15 In it he wrote, "Put Uriah in the front line where the fighting is fiercest. Then withdraw from him so he will be struck down and die."
16 So while Joab had the city under siege, he put Uriah at a place where he knew the strongest defenders were. 17 When the men of the city came out and fought against Joab, some of the men in David's army fell; moreover, Uriah the Hittite died.
18 Joab sent David a full account of the battle. 19 He instructed the messenger: "When you have finished giving the king this account of the battle, 20 the king's anger may flare up, and he may ask you, 'Why did you get so close to the city to fight? Didn't you know they would shoot arrows from the wall? 21 Who killed Abimelech son of Jerub-Besheth [b] ? Didn't a woman throw an upper millstone on him from the wall, so that he died in Thebez? Why did you get so close to the wall?' If he asks you this, then say to him, 'Also, your servant Uriah the Hittite is dead.' "
22 The messenger set out, and when he arrived he told David everything Joab had sent him to say. 23 The messenger said to David, "The men overpowered us and came out against us in the open, but we drove them back to the entrance to the city gate. 24 Then the archers shot arrows at your servants from the wall, and some of the king's men died. Moreover, your servant Uriah the Hittite is dead."
25 David told the messenger, "Say this to Joab: 'Don't let this upset you; the sword devours one as well as another. Press the attack against the city and destroy it.' Say this to encourage Joab."
26 When Uriah's wife heard that her husband was dead, she mourned for him. 27 After the time of mourning was over, David had her brought to his house, and she became his wife and bore him a son. But the thing David had done displeased the LORD.
In this story we see a King who has all the power in the world. He has his wives, he has his children, he has an army, he seemingly has it all, and then one day he notices her. She is bathing on the rooftop, and she is beautiful. He shouldn’t even be at the Palace at this time, as his people are fighting a war, but he is. Instead of turning away he stares. He gazes upon her beauty and he wants her. He knows she is married to one of his warriors but that does not deter him. So what does he do? He sends his messenger to her and has her come to the palace. Well, you know what happens next. After the deed is done, she leaves and goes back home. A while later she sends a messenger back to David saying that she has conceived his child. Instead of admitting his fault, he tries to cover up the affair by bringing her husband home from war. He fills him with wine and spirits and then tries to get him to sleep with his wife. The husband, who is a dedicated soldier, refuses to sleep with his own wife, therefore, preventing the cover up the king had in mind. In a last effort to cover his behind, the King sends the warrior back to war and puts him on the front line, knowing that death will be inevitable. The warrior does indeed die, and the King brings the woman into his house as his wife. She bears a son, the prince, and they live happily ever after! Okay, so they don’t live happily ever after at all. It is one big mess. It is a mess that displeases God. It becomes a family that is built on deceptions and lies. And it is a decision that will haunt the king for the rest of his life. But, there would come redemption.
What does this sobering account of a family have to do with us here at family weekend? Well I’m not exactly sure. I was fighting against preaching on this text today, but I just could not run away from the lectionary. The text kept drawing me back. So, I will attempt to make some points from this story.
This story of King David is like the many stories that we hear these days. Like the three politicians I talked about earlier, David loses focus of his calling and falls into the hands of lust and infidelity. King David: he was the High King of Israel. He was God’s anointed one that was called to lead. He was a man after God’s own heart. If David can fall, then it is no wonder that these Politicians, and numerous others can fall. I chose these three politicians to start off with because they all three are men of Faith who are outspoken about what family is and how important family is in our society. It is their common membership in this secret Washington DC Christian club, called “the Fellowship” or “The Family” that has gained them even more attention than is probably necessary. “The Fellowship” is secretive fraternity of sorts, in Washington D.C., that makes core family values the heart of their organization. It is only men, it is only one political party involved, and it has now come under much scrutiny, as three of their most revered members have fallen from “grace”. I am not here to bash this organization or these men. Yes, what these politicians did was wrong. But we are not called to cast stones, we are called to love. We are called to hold these men accountable, yes, but we are also called to extend not only justice, but mercy and grace. I do not want to glorify them either, because what they did was wrong, but I want to use them as an example to say that family can sometimes be ugly. Family is not always pretty. Here are these three men who advocate for the perfect family. One man. One woman. 3 Kids. Perfect house. Etc. And yet, we see that this “perfect family” often times is imperfect. There is no such thing as perfect family. However, that does not mean that God cannot work in the imperfect family through the power of God’s own son, Jesus Christ. For you see, King David’s family wasn’t perfect. David stole Bathsheba, had her husband killed and then brought her into his house where he already had many wives of his own. Yet, Jesus Christ came out of David’s line. When you look at the genealogy of Jesus, you notice that Jesus’ lineage includes Solomon, the son of David and Bathsheba. So God took this situation, where at least 3 of the 10 commandments were broken, and used it in bringing Jesus Christ into this world. God took this Ancient Soap Opera and brought about the Prince of Peace, the Everlasting one, The Redeeming one!
So what does the perfect family look like? Well, I’m not sure if we will ever know, but I know that at camp this summer, I have gotten a glimpse of a beautiful family. This family is the team. Is it perfect? NO! Is it always easy? NO! Is it always fun? NO! But because the team is all here, living in community, serving Christ by serving these campers, a family has been born. This family worships together. This family eats together. This family plays together. This family prays together. This family cries together. This family gets mad at each other, and sometimes fights together. This family has even gotten sick together. This family is a true family and I would argue that the bonds that are formed in the midst of serving Christ can sometimes be stronger than the bonds that we have with our own families. There are those who have no family at all, and there are those who do not have healthy families. There are those that do have a family, but they do not see their family as their own. That is why I say that family is so much more than blood. In Mark, Jesus is talking with the disciples when his mother and siblings come to him. Someone in the crowd tells Jesus that his mother, brothers, and sisters are outside and they are looking for him. Jesus responds, “Who are my brothers and sisters and mother?” As he looked at the crowd of disciples around him, those whom served with him, sojourned with him, healed with him, loved with him, he said, “Here are my brothers and sisters and my mother. Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother.” This summer as we have all worked together. As we have all served together, we have realized our brotherhood and sisterhood that can only come in Christ, and in our shared humanity as children of the Triune God.
Personally, there are many people in my life who I consider to be family. They come from all phases of my life and very few of them are related to me. As an only child, I do not have any siblings who are related to me by blood. But yet, I do have a sister. In fact, she’s here today and her name is Melanie. She’s here with my mom, her husband, and her two beautiful daughters. See, when I was much younger, and when she was much younger, my parents opened up our house and our lives to her. She lived with us for a while and she has always been in my life. Are we related by blood? No. Does that mean she is not my sister? No. She is my sister, and we have a closer relationship than many of my friends have with their siblings. To even share a bit more about family, Melanie also has opened up her house and her home to two beautiful girls by the wonderful gift of adoption. Maci and Riley may not have been conceived by Brent and Melanie, but that does not make them any less their children. They are their beautiful, wonderful daughters, and they are my beautiful and wonderful nieces. They are my family. Is it sometimes messy? Yes. Is it hard to explain? Yes. But it is family. They are my family. As are so many in my life.
Like I said, family can be messy and family can often times be just plain confusing. Just look at the story of David and Bathsheba. David’s family was insane! In Slam by Nick Hornby there is a picture of a family that is, well, it is strange to say the least. You see, this family is one where a son gets his girlfriend pregnant and then he finds out that his mom is pregnant as well. Sam is the son, and he and his girlfriend have a baby named Roof. Roof is born one month before Sam’s mom has her daughter. When Sam’s mom gives birth to her daughter, Sam and his son, Roof, go to the hospital to see his mom. Mark, the mom’s boyfriend is also there. Picture the hospital scene as I read Sam’s narration,
“Mum’s baby Emily was born in the same hospital as Roof, but in the room next door. Mark was there, of course, and I took Roof in on the bus a couple of hours later. ‘Here’s grandma,’ I said when we went in. ‘And here’s your auntie.’ Mum was used to being Grandma by then, but not so many people get called Grandma while they are nursing a baby. And not many people get called Auntie when they’re two hours old. ‘Bloody,’ said Mark. ‘What a mess.’ He was laughing, but Mum wasn’t having it.’ ‘Why is it a mess?’ she said. ‘She’s been alive for five minutes, and she’s got a nephew who’s older than her, and two half brothers with different mothers, and a mum who’s a grandmother, and God knows what else.’ ‘What else?’ asks mum. ‘Well. Nothing else.’ Says Mark, ‘But that is a lot.’ ‘It’s just a family, isn’t it?’ asks mum. ‘A family where everyone’s the wrong age,’ replies Mark. “Oh don’t be so stuffy. There is no such thing as a right age’.”
I think Sam’s mom is onto something. There is no such thing as a right age, but I would also say there is no such thing as a right family. We see that this family is quite abnormal when compared to what we think of as normal family. All the children were born out of wedlock, one set of parents was 17, the other set was much older, and so forth and so on; but the Mom knew that even though it was different, it was still beautiful. Family in whatever form that comes in, albeit messed up, is beautiful. Families that bring Christ to the center of their lives are beautiful.
As Christians, who are seeking to live lives like Christ, we need to remember that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ because of our common humanity as children of the Triune God. We cannot pick and chose who are family members are, because God already did that. God created us all, and God calls us all God’s own beloved children. The waters of baptism transcend the blood that flows through our veins. The waters of baptism hold stronger than the blood that runs through our veins. For all of us, family looks different. Some of us come from the traditional family with two parents and siblings. Some of us come from a family where our parents are no longer together. Some of us are only children. Some of us have lost our moms, our dads, or both. Family looks different for all of us, but we still are one family, who are joined together by the bond of Jesus Christ. That goes for all! Not just for those of us who are in here. But those in our lives we scorn. Those in our lives we cast out. Those in our lives we try to push to the “other side.” Those in our lives whom we label as “outsider” because, well, they can never be a true “Christian” because of the way they live their life. Those who are different colors than us. Those who are richer than us. Those who are poorer than us. Those who are bigger than us. Those who are smaller than us. Those who are smarter than us. Those who don’t walk like us. Those who don’t talk like us. Those who don’t worship like us. Those who don’t live like us. Those who don’t love like us. Those who don’t have the same sexuality as us. Those who don’t agree with us. Those who don’t even love us. They are all our brothers and sisters in our common humanity, and we can not be the judges of whether they are in or out. All we can do is love them, and include them into our family, so they become part of us, and us part of them. It is the beauty of family, it is the beautiful mess of family. Because, let’s be honest, if Jesus can be born out of a line that includes adultery, prostitution, and other beautiful messes, then Jesus can come into our own families and recreate and redeem them. We just have to allow Christ to come in and transform us, and our families. The way we are able to do that is by becoming families that offer hospitality to the outsider. We have to become families that are open to serving the world. We also have to remember that family does not always manifest itself in likely ways. We have to be willing to change, and let the Spirit guide us. Family is so much more than we can understand. The bonds that hold us together as brothers and sisters of the Triune God are so much more than we can understand. But that is part of the overwhelming beauty that is family.
Again, Christ came out of David’s line. Christ came out of Bathsheba’s line. Christ came into this world to recreate us, redeem us, and make all things new. Chist is available to the politicians, Christ is available to us. Christ is an ever present reality, we just need to ask for eyes to see Christ, hearts to feel Christ, and we need to seek out Christ in our families, because, Christ is there. So remember, on this family weekend, we are all one big family! We may not understand it, we may not want to be part of it, but we are all one family! In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
